Highs and Lows

Dearest Family,

I forgot to tell you last week, but my P-day was changed. It will be on Mondays for at least the next six weeks. Which kinda stinks because I didn't give you the time to email me this week. That's alright. It's my fault, so don't feel bad.

This week has been another roller coaster. Some highs and some lows. Which do you want first? Well, I'll give you brief lows and then some highs. How does that sound?

First of all, we had two rough lessons in one morning. Both were people who are so afraid of being decieved that they will not rely on feelings ("the metaphysical") to learn truth at all. They want to logic and argue through it. They don't relize that that is indeed Satan decieving them. So basically they are all resisting the Holy Ghost, which make my job pretty much impossible. One of the people we are--were--teaching got ahold of a book that was basically antimormon literature written by a mormon. It's called An Insider's View of Joseph Smith or Mormonism or something. All I know is that the author "debunks" (note the quotations) the Book of Mormon and Joseph Smith. He says that pretty much all of that is a bunch of bologna, but the sense of community and the social aspect of the church is nice, so he's kept his faith. So join our church because it is fun! Well, that is a bunch of bologna. And this investigator was basing all of her research on the church on that book. She hasn't even made an effort to read the Book of Mormon, which from any point of view should be part of her research into our church.

Sister Lewis and I have been talking a lot about how to help these people, but we're hitting a brick wall. We can't teach without the spirit, so if they won't recieve it, they won't recieve us, no matter what we say.

The one thing we will say is that there is no way for this church to just be "nice" or to have the Book of Mormon, while being factually incorrect, being partly "good". See here is the thing. Joseph Smith claimed to have seen God. So that leaves us with two options: either he did, or he is a horrible, evil, lying man. Because that would be a horrible, evil thing to say if it wasn't true. That claim has led to the deaths of many people and impacted millions. So that puts the Book of Mormon in the same light. Either it is scripture, or it was written by a horrible to man to do evil things. We really have to face that. There are no other options. Is it good? Does it invite us to Christ? Then it must be true. But they won't even crack it open.

Anyway, that was a rough day. Not to mention that the member with us kind of took over the lesson...but that's alright. I'm glad they came anyway.

The other guy we taught basically told us he doesn't trust any authority. He loves the bible, but he doesn't even trust that because everyone reads it so differently. All he trusts is the Creation, the 10 commandments, and the words of Christ. He thinks if he keeps it to just those -- not praying even to ask for more--he won't be decieved. So he dropped us.

Happy stuff. Last Tuesday night was a huge high of a day. :) We were able to see an investigator that we thought was avoiding us, and had a good lesson! She misses us and can see the goodness in us. She enjoys the light we bring into her home, and she really wants to come to church. Now we just need to get her to see that she can have that light in herself. Sometimes it is hard to get people to believe they can change their lives. So we need her to really want it. She's awesome.

And then we showed up to get her to church. She told us to make her go. So we pounded on the front and back doors several times, and Sister Lewis may or may not have actually checked to see if the door was locked. We heard a voice inside, but no one let us in. Later, we got ahold of her daughter who said her mom was still sleeping, and just wanted to sleep. I think we need to have two plans of attack: 1) teach her the Word of Wisdom so that she will be available Sunday mornings and 2) Be in contact with her Saturday night (being at the VC makes that difficult, so maybe a morning drop by and a night phone call). It's gonna happen.

We also got two new investigators this week that are super solid. One is the husband of a member. He's met with missionaries before, but he "scared them off", he said. He comes to church every week, so we thought it was time he took the lessons again. The other is the fiance of a member. They are both really nice men who have real desire to learn about the church. Sister Lewis and I are excited. :)

Selene has now been baptized for a whole week, and it is been a really rough week. She is already hitting the refiner's fire. So please pray for her! Mom, maybe you could put her name in the temple. I can't do that, but you could (is it allowed for me to say that? I don't know). Her name is Selene Kaye. She needs strength to keep it up. She's amazing!

As far as everything else goes, it is an exciting time for the area! The temple is getting closer and closer. Yesterday fast and testimony meeting was entirely about the temple. Everyone is talking about it. All of the youth are practicing for the cultural event and are SO excited. The ward got to send some people to help assemble the chandeliers. It's neat because the people that were selected were all of the people that needed the strength from the time they spent in the temple putting them together. Selene went, some less actives, and some people who were struggling with one thing or another. I know it strengthened all of them. They got to spend a few hours in a sealing room and the celestial room. They said that each crystal was worth $50-$100, and there was hundreds of them in each chandelier. I can't imagine. I'm so excited to see everything. All of our members are talking about their friends suddenly having interest in the church, and everyone we have talked to is SO excited for the website to be open on March 12th for tickets. It's madness. It sounds like I will get to do 2 days in helping with the open house. Best thing ever. :)

I took a really good tour ("presentation") the other day. It was a woman and a man that were dating. In so many ways it reminds me of the way that everything began with Selene. Except that this man was visiting from California. They met online and have only met in person 3 times now. She is a member, and he is not. She said the first time they met she felt impressed to share her testimony. She really believes that the reason (insert here--I just recieved your email! Yay!)

that they met was so that she could share the gospel with him. I really believe her. He is a really special person and I'm almost positive that he will be baptized. So I had a wonderful time showing them around the VC. They came back last night, so it was fun to see them again. I hope he has good elders in California. He is really searching for truth.

You know, I have been thinking about how cool a mission is recently. It means the world to me! This has been so hard. And so wonderful. I've changed a lot out here. So thank you so much for supporting me! Thanks for giving me a body and life and a wonderful childhood and the gospel and a happy home and a way to go on a mission. thank you. I feel like I am accomplishing part of my life's purpose out here. I'm being/becoming the person I'm supposed to be. So thank you.

This week I learned a lot about how to be a missionary from Alma 17-42. Some cool stuff is in there. We have a general authority coming next week to talk to us about it. I'm excited to hear what he has to say. I'm also reading the New Testament, which is amazing. Something I learned: Luke 10:17-18 (and 19 I guess). The seventy are sent out to preach the gospel. They come back, amazed at the power they have over devils in Christ's name. Then He tells them, well, "I beheld Satan as lightning fall from heaven." So basically, yes, we have power over devils because ultimately, I have power over satan. If Satan could be cast out of heaven, so could all of these devils. Cool. I don't know if that is important to our salvation, but interesting. Christ has all power over Satan. He's gonna win. We just have to be on the right side of the battle!

The other thing, is that the Book of Mormon is so true. I just know that these people are real people! I can hear their voices from the dust, and I can see them going through what they went through. I can see that some of them had favorite subjects to talk about, personalities, flaws, excitements, disappointments--they were real people. I can basically see Alma whipping himself around when he hears the people who are actually prepared for the gospel (Alma 32. v. 6 in particular). Can you see it? He's preachin' the gospel, basically soap boxing it. There's this croud. Then he hears a guy behind him yell, (hands cupped around his mouth) "Hey! You! What are we gonna do? We can't worship in our churches!!" And Alma hears it, and just does a 180 to see who's yellin'. And sees the prepared people. Super happy missionary.

Well, I gotta go, but I love you! I know I am where I need to be. :)

~Sister April Atkin